The Christian Wife

The Christian wife will be most effective, joy-filled, and loving if she loves the Lord more than she loves her husband. If God is her ‘first love’, and remains number one in her life, she will have more joy as she fulfills her duties as a Christian wife.

In terms of the husband/wife relationship, ‘submission’ is not the most popular word in the female vocabulary.

“Submission means that a wife acknowledges her husband’s headship as spiritual leader and guide for the family. It has nothing whatsoever to do with her denying or suppressing her will, her spirit, her intellect, her gifts, or her personality. To submit means to recognize, affirm, and support her husband’s God-given responsibility of overall family leadership. Biblical submission of a wife to her husband is a submission of position, not personhood. It is the free and willing subordination of an equal to an equal for the sake of order, stability, and obedience to God’s design. As a man, a husband will fulfill his destiny and his manhood as he exercises his headship in prayerful and humble submission to Christ and gives himself in sacrificial love to his wife.”–Dr. Myles Munroe

In today’s society, due to the impact of the feminist movement, some women are opposed to the idea of submitting to any man. They consider it demeaning because they see it as a step back in time with them being second class citizens in a male chauvinistic world. The problem is that this ideal is based on an unbiblical philosophy that makes it okay for women to be in the role of men and men to be in the role of women. The result is a society with slowly eroding values, a 50% divorce rate, dysfunctional families, very rebellious families, and many unhappy, unfulfilled marriages. This was never God’s intention for us and He gave us Biblical guidelines of authority and submission to maintain order. Ephesians 5:22 (NKJV) tells us, Wives, submit to your husbands as to the Lord. Submission is NOT, slavery, disobedience to God, always agreeing with your husband, or being disrespected. I once heard a pastor define submission as “The joyful willingness to follow the one God has placed in authority over you.” Ephesians 5:23 (NKJV) says, For the husband is head of the wife, as also Christ is head of the church; and He is Savior of the body. Submission begins with your relationship to the Lord. If you are not submitting to your Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ, you certainly will not submit to your husband. You have to believe God loves you and His way is best. Submission is about obedience to God and respecting the position God has given your husband.

God has established an order of authority and submission within the marriage. God designed men and women to fulfill specific roles within the marriage. When you neglect, disregard, or just don’t have a clear understanding of your role within the marriage, the result is frustration and confusion. You will become a part of a dysfunctional relationship. When a husband refuses or neglects to lovingly lead his Christian wife, the wife gets frustrated and loses respect for the husband. She might even take over the leadership role which is contrary to God’s design. If a Christian wife refuses to respect and submit to her husband, he will find it difficult to show her love. There is a breakdown in the relationship and welcome to the crazy cycle! The Crazy Cycle is: Without love she reacts without respect and without respect he reacts without love. Just like God loves His children, husbands should love their wives unconditionally. Along with that, regarding the wife and her attitude and treatment towards her husband, respect is not earned, it is a basic human right that should be given to every person.

You are called to submit to your husband, but that does not mean you are in a position of inferiority. Your husband is in a position of leadership, but this does not equate to a position of superiority. Genesis 1:27 (NIV) tells us, So God created man in His own image, in the image of God He created him; male and female He created them. Women, like men, are made in the image of God and, therefore, have equal worth and status before God.

As a Christian wife you are to submit to your husband, but you should only follow your husband if he is lovingly leading you according to the Bible. Acts 5:29 says, We ought to obey God rather than men. You should never do anything your husband asks that is contrary to the Word of God. You are still called to answer to God, first and foremost, and your husband second.

Many Christian women are familiar with Proverbs 31:10-31. It speaks of the MANY Biblical qualities of a Christian wife. While many women believe this woman must be ‘superwoman’, it is easier to digest all of these qualities when you realize this is what God expects from you over your LIFETIME! You will have different hats in different seasons of your life as a wife: career woman, mother, homemaker, working mom, empty nest, and new career. Whatever season of life you are in as a wife, you should have an ever-growing intimate relationship with the Lord as you grow and mature spiritually. God wants you to have a heart to serve. He wants you to seek Him passionately to enable you to maximize the use of your God-given abilities to please Him, glorify Him, and live a life of victory!

Go Live The Victory!